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Me being silly. 
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Everyone who knows me is very fond of me, I'm a good man. I abhor any form of dishonesty and even have a go at workmates who are shirking, if you're being paid to work then it is dishonest to sit tapping away at your iphone or jabbering to your family on the work phone. But I am an amateur humorist and try to see the funny side of everything. A friend told me he considered me the funniest person alive. I could probably give any comedian a run for his money with spontaneous wit. I have sometimes been in tears of laughter at my own humour when sending texts to friends. An ex colleague e-mailed me a photo last year and asked me to add a funny caption - I replied within a couple of minutes with a quite funny response. he knew I could do it.

Lew you've caught me out good and proper - my joke did mention the woman in question but then the topical nature of the gag helps to make it. If i'd just said "A man walks into a supermarket and beheads a woman.." you'd say it doesn't work because the situation has been contrived purely to accommodate the punchline. Anyway I'll look out for some more pictures to add captions to in order to make you all warm to me again.

PS I belong to the RSPB so can't be all bad.


17 May 2011, 21:01
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I wasn't criticizing you Steve, or casting doubts on your personality. Just pointing out that the joke was specifically about that poor woman, contrary to what you'd said.

I've done some bad taste stuff myself in Viz over the years, but jokes that are specifically about individual victims tend to leave me cold. If it has to be so recent, I'd make the joke at the expense of the murderer, not the victim.

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17 May 2011, 23:04
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Rick Mayall got himself booed off in either Nottingham or Leicester (can't recall which) many years ago when he made a `joke` about a young lad who had tragically died when getting trapped in a fridge that had been dumped on a local spot notorious for waste dumping! Mayall really got `flak` over that! Taste? Its a minefield really!

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19 May 2011, 14:32
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Well its been over a year and here's today's photo-caption:

Image


20 Jun 2012, 23:08
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Funnily enough as I came out of Surrey Quays Station tonight two rather stunning young women walked past me and, under my breath. I muttered "Lor luv a duck" honest. I don't think I've ever used that phrase before - normally its "Stone the bleedin' crows". I mentioned it to a mate who seems to think I have come over all Dick Van Dyke - but he's a West Ham fan so he can't talk.

I'll have to do some more captions.

I don't know why but with all of my last posts they have appeared twice and I have had to delete one. Is it just me?


04 Sep 2013, 22:00
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I'm working on the screenplay for the next Star Trek film entiled Star Trek: Planet of the Alf Ippititimuses. Where a distant race have picked up signals of vintage Des O'Connor shows and regard Jack Douglas's stuttering persona a godlike being and have chosen to emulate his characteristics. Spock's eyebrows quickly go into orbit at their frenzied utterances.


11 Jun 2015, 12:48
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My mate Steve just e-mailed this response. Is he right? Which came first?

His message:

That reminds me of the Skrull planet in FF where they pose as gangsters (Kirby nicked the idea from Star Trek of course).


11 Jun 2015, 12:50
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He's right. The Star Trek episode 'A Piece of the Action' was first broadcast in 1968 while the Kirby story appeared the following year (by that time Jack was refusing to create new concepts for Marvel).


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11 Jun 2015, 14:23
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I made up this wheeze yesterday. For older viewers only:

When Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young got together how did they decide the name of the band?

Dave Crosby: "Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young sounds good

Steve Stills: "I disagree. I think Stills, Young, Nash and Crosby has a better ring to it.

Graham Nash: "Nonsense its obvious it should be Nash, Young, Crosby and Stills.

Neil Young: "You're all idiots Young, Stills, Crosby and Nash is the only possible name we could go for."

Knock at door. Graham Nash: "Its Dave Dee, he wants to join the group."

Dave Dee: "Hi guys, now which one of you fancies being called Beaky?"


30 Jun 2015, 14:05
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I got this e-mail from my mate Steve who is working his way through TV21:

Just got up to issue 105 of TV Century 21, the Daleks have now been replaced on the back page by Fireball XL5, still Noble art thankfully, although the previous story was in black and white and not by him. I’d forgotten that the spaceship drawn by Ron Turner in the final Daleks strip is a saucer shape with a giant Dalek head at the top - amazing. The last panel has the emperor saying “we shall conquer Earth”, so I guess it’s over to TV Comic for Dr Who to fight them.


And here is my reply:

I always imagine that the story continues in the film Daleks Invasion of Earth 2050AD where they take on Bernard Cribbins in retaliation against his song Right Said Fred.

Dalek voice "Comedy hit records? I should cocoa, you will be exterminated as will Benny Hill, Peter Sellers and Bernard Bresslaw. EXTERMINATE"


01 Dec 2015, 16:24
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...Sounds like a Spike Milligan sketch! :-)

(Incidentally, weren't the back-page Fireballs drawn by Don Lawrence?)


01 Dec 2015, 17:26
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That was my thought but Steve is a big fan of Mike Noble but I must admit I don't remember him doing the back cover strips. By the way he said on Sounds of the Sixties on Radio 2 they played a novelty record by the Daleks, can anyone identify it?


01 Dec 2015, 20:46
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stevezodiac wrote:
That was my thought but Steve is a big fan of Mike Noble but I must admit I don't remember him doing the back cover strips.


Your pal is correct. When Fireball moved to the back page with TV21 No.105 Mike Noble was the artist up to No.108. Then Don Lawrence took over with issue 109.

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01 Dec 2015, 22:21
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Two recent incidents:

Last night on the tube a young man offered me his seat. I gratefully declined but also became paranoid that I may no longer look like a thirty something. On the way home I picked up a garden shed sized tub of Nivea to prevent any future humiliating occurrences of the kind.

Is one allowed to give someone a right hander for what is, in effect, a back-handed public insult?

This morning I grabbed a jacket out of the wardrobe and left for work but when I was sitting on the bus it occurred to me it felt a bit tight - I had grabbed the wrong one and it was a bit small. I should have cottoned on when several people shouted "Mr Grimsdale!" at me in the street. Its not too bad though and I should lose a few more pounds so it will fit proper in the future.

It also occurs to me that all those admiring glances from young ladies on the tube were actually looks of wardrobe malfunction awareness.

Never mind - no-one died.


04 Dec 2015, 13:35
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stevezodiac wrote:
Last night on the tube a young man offered me his seat. I gratefully declined but also became paranoid that I may no longer look like a thirty something.
You've not got much to worry about, Steve! When I get on the Tube women offer me their seat, especially if I have my travel bag with me. The youngest one so far looked no more than 18 or 19. I feel guilty accepting but they always insist.


04 Dec 2015, 16:19
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