Issue 1

From the ashes of the DFC rises... the Phoenix.

Moderator: AndyB

User avatar
swirlythingy
Posts: 562
Joined: 17 Mar 2011, 00:16
Location: Wimbledon, UK

Re: Issue 1

Post by swirlythingy »

On the subject of subscription adverts, as of this week's issue, the line-up of covers has been changed to include some from after issue 5. Still no sign of any more peeks four issues into the future, though! (Which may not be that bad a thing, if they're going to print pictures of covers before even they know what they're going to look like...)
Help! Help! We're being held prisoner in a signature factory!

felneymike
Fence Sitter
Posts: 1901
Joined: 30 Sep 2007, 15:03
Location: Cambridgeshire
Contact:

Re: Issue 1

Post by felneymike »

I wouldn't mind pictures of future covers even if they do turn out to be wrong. Just think of what pedantic bloggers will be able to say about them in 100 years time! :lol:

Anyway I've just opened issue 11, and I see there is a three-column illustrated text serial! Heartily approved. Though it could do with an Edwardian detective, preferably with a cockney assistant and intelligent bloodhound.

steelclaw
DC Skelton
Posts: 1868
Joined: 01 Mar 2006, 19:24

Re: Issue 1

Post by steelclaw »

I'm waiting for the first Ad for sweets/cakes or toys to appear, surely it's only a matter of time, to think of all the money they could make.
Image

felneymike
Fence Sitter
Posts: 1901
Joined: 30 Sep 2007, 15:03
Location: Cambridgeshire
Contact:

Re: Issue 1

Post by felneymike »

His supreme owlishness will not allow anything other than beak wax, signed pellets and feather conditioner to be advertised. ALL HAIL THE OWL!

User avatar
swirlythingy
Posts: 562
Joined: 17 Mar 2011, 00:16
Location: Wimbledon, UK

Re: Issue 1

Post by swirlythingy »

For the last nine issues, I've been travelling up to Gosh! every Saturday to pick up the Phoenix from the one place which could be relied upon to stock it without fail. Apart from a brief panic one week when it turned out they'd moved it to a shelf on the other side of the shop, this has generally worked well.

Today, I found out what happens when the only link in the chain breaks down.

I arrived at Gosh! and was met by the horrific sight of absolutely no copies of issue #13. Wondering if they'd hidden them away again, I asked at the till, and thus I learned of the unwelcome news that, apparently, the weekly shipment had come in that morning, but had immediately been sent away again because it was "damaged" in some unspecified way, and they were hoping to get a refund. (Presumably they were not referring to the prominent handiwork of our All Knowing All Seeing Most Handsome Emperor of the Owl (formerly Phoenix), Barnaby Knowles.)

I was left with two choices - come back later in the week and hope they'd sorted themselves out, or return to the dreaded routine of fruitlessly scouring every damn Waitrose I could find.

Had this been any other weekend I would probably just have given up and gone home, but on this particular day I was planning to go onwards to Watford (long story - no, seriously, you really don't want to know), so I decided that if I passed any Waitroses, I would check out the magazine rack, but I didn't have high hopes. The best that could be said for my prospects was that at least I'd have the opportunity to fail lots of times, because if ever there was a local social profile heavily inclined towards the purchase of obscure vegetables, posh cheeses and glorified ready meals at inflated prices, Metro-land could be relied upon to deliver.

I made my first attempt at Northwood. I wasn't planning to get off the bus at Northwood, but I went right past a Waitrose and I couldn't bear to let it pass just in case it was north-west London's equivalent of Worcester Park. I soon found out that it was a closer equivalent than I'd hoped for, because the desk reported (after a considerable wait and much consulting with others) that they had had the Phoenix, but they'd sold out last Thursday. When I enquired whether a new shipment had come in that morning, it being a weekly comic and all (which took some time; the concept seemed quite alien to her), I eventually got an answer in the negative.

And so to Rickmansworth, where I got off the bus and prepared to board a proper form of transport instead. Sure enough (I said it was proper rah-rah country), I was driven right past another Waitrose, which I decided to interrogate before getting the train. Rickmansworth Waitrose is, incidentally, an utter horror of a specimen with its main entrance on the top deck of a seven-level multi-storey car park, which is an experience I hope never to repeat. I had even worse luck than at Northwood; the welcome desk had never even seen a copy of the Phoenix.

The assistant then offered to take me on the next step of the oh-so-familiar dance, and resigned to my fate, she commenced the dreary ritual of ringing round every local branch to see if some branch of Waitrose, any branch of Waitrose, stocks this comic which is supposed to be available in all branches of Waitrose. Yet there is some small amount of improvement visible since the last time I had to put myself through this. I already had evidence of prior presence of the comic at at least one store, even if they couldn't stretch to the current issue, but the most noticeable difference between the time I spent hanging around at Raynes Park and the time at Rickmansworth is that the Rickmansworth woman had only got as far as ringing the first store on her extensive list when she turned round, and spoke to me the miraculous, magical, tell-tale words: "Which issue number did you want?"

And that's how I arrived at the welcome desk at Chesham. True to form, although I had successfully reserved my copy of issue #13 of the Phoenix, I was once again the only person buying the comic from that branch of Waitrose on the day it supposedly came out, for it was nowhere to be seen on the shelves. This time round, they didn't even have a little pile of them behind the desk - when I successfully located someone who knew what I was talking about, she disappeared off to the opposite side of the shop, went through a very industrial-looking door and came back quite some time later clutching this rarest of all treasures, a publication I was assured could be obtained simply by turning up to my local branch of Waitrose and picking it off the shelf like any other comic.

But I did eventually manage to jump through all necessary hoops, and at least things have got better since the time I tried to purchase issue #3. As in, I only had to try three stores instead of seven...

Also, on the way back, I had to help a young woman determine at what time her bus was due to arrive, because she "didn't want to have to read the timetable" posted immediately next to her. I do wonder about humanity sometimes...
Help! Help! We're being held prisoner in a signature factory!

User avatar
Digifiend
Posts: 7315
Joined: 15 Aug 2007, 11:43
Location: Hull, UK

Re: Issue 1

Post by Digifiend »

Poor show. They should've had them on the shelves, not stuck in the warehouse. And why that other branch didn't get a shipment I don't know.

steelclaw
DC Skelton
Posts: 1868
Joined: 01 Mar 2006, 19:24

Re: Issue 1

Post by steelclaw »

After trying my local Waitrose (which had started stocking it at around Issue8) with no luck on saturday they've always had at least 2 in stock saturday morning, I went to GOSH today, the women in there said it no we haven't got issue 13 it usually comes in late, she obviously didn't have a clue about it, as it was always in there either friday or saturday and never late until this issue and no mention of damaged comics.
I can't be bothered doing the rounds of Waitrose I'm far to old drudging around shops.
So unlucky Issue 13 is going to be a rare collectors item.

User avatar
Gary Northfield
Posts: 98
Joined: 03 Mar 2006, 12:28
Location: London
Contact:

Re: Issue 1

Post by Gary Northfield »

I happened to be in York for a wedding this weekend and popped into Travelling Man to see if they had any copies. Issue 12 was prominently displayed on the front counter and issue 13 had turned up that very morning (Thursday!) so big cheers all round.

Shame about the Gosh! damaged copies, but I'm sure they'll get replacements in soon enough. They're a good bunch of people in there and love their comics and I was very pleased to see they'd moved the Phoenix to a prominent shelf right near the front door as you walk in.

Apart from the unlucky one or two having trouble getting hold of copies in Waitrose, I hope those who are buying it are still enjoying the stories!

(Also, the Phoenix recently tweeted that if you go to a Waitrose and can't find any copies, let them know and they'll make sure that branch gets extra copies - https://twitter.com/#!/phoenixcomicuk/s ... 0951044096 )

big bad bri
Posts: 1761
Joined: 03 Mar 2006, 15:50

Re: Issue 1

Post by big bad bri »

Gosh! had plenty of iss 13 in today along with 14.

User avatar
swirlythingy
Posts: 562
Joined: 17 Mar 2011, 00:16
Location: Wimbledon, UK

Re: Issue 1

Post by swirlythingy »

Today, on my regular jaunt to Gosh (despite having a huge Waitrose relatively near to my house), I walked right past Alan Moore signing books on the table next to the shelf where the Phoenixes are kept. The queue stretched some distance out of the door.

Five minutes later, and for the second time in twenty-two issues, a seedy-looking woman clutching a cigarette accosted me in the really dodgy part of the street and asked if I'd like to "look at our girls". I was even shorter with her than with the last one, by which I mean I told her to f*** off.

Just another Soho Saturday...
Help! Help! We're being held prisoner in a signature factory!

User avatar
Digifiend
Posts: 7315
Joined: 15 Aug 2007, 11:43
Location: Hull, UK

Re: Issue 1

Post by Digifiend »

Sounds like a prostitution ring - I hope you called the police.

Post Reply